"Big Love" stars clockwise from upper left Jeanne Tripplehorn, Chloe Sevigny, Ginnifer Goodwin, and Bill Paxton. Inset, social worker Patricia Merkley.

“Big Love,” HBO’s critically acclaimed series about the trials and tribulations of a polygamous family in Utah, kicks off its fourth season Jan. 10 at 9 p.m. Eastern.

Utah social worker Patricia Merkley LCSW encourages folks to watch the program to learn about a little-known and often misunderstood segment of American society. Yet “Big Love” depicts just a tiny part of modern-day polygamy in Utah and other parts of the Western United States, she said.

“It can’t portray a whole population because in the intermountain West there are about 40,000 polygamists,” said Merkley, 52, who earned a masters degree in social work from the University of Utah and is a National Association of Social Workers member. “There are different groups and they emphasize different things.”

Merkley ought to know. She leads a two-member team of social workers that Utah hired to reach out and offer services to polygamous families in the vast, mountainous state, which covers 85,000 square miles. Polygamy is illegal in the United States but Utah decided to instead focus on crimes within such communities and work to improve relations with and extend services to polygamous families, who often live in isolated areas.

To read more about Utah’s position on polygamy, click here.

In “Big Love” actor Bill Paxton portrays “Bill Henrickson,” a member of a breakaway polygamy sect who tried but failed to live discretely with his three wives and eight children in suburban Salt Lake City. Merkley said some polygamist families are like the fictional Henricksons and try to blend into mainstream society.

However, there are other polygamists who live in fundamentalist religious communities or practice a communal way of life, she said.

The public has a high level of bias and anger toward polygamous families due partly to news coverage of children being removed from a polygamous community in Texas. However, Merkley said there is no research that indicates there is more domestic violence or child abuse in polygamous households.

The founding Mormons practiced polygamy but in 1890 the church banned men from having many wives so Utah could gain statehood. So although she is a Mormon Merkley said the practice of having multiple wives and large families is as alien to her as it is to most Americans. As a social worker she tries to treat her polygamous clients with respect and dignity.

“It was so vastly different for me. I have been working with them for six years and I still say the wrong things and make assumptions,” she said. “I’m still learning.”

Polygamous families deal with the same issues traditional families deal with except “everything is amplified” because you are dealing with multiple marital relationships, women and children in the same household, Merkley said.

“It is fascinating to hear just the added level of conflict and struggle when you have more than one wife cooking, when you have more than one wife disciplining the children, and more than one wife trying to spend the money in one way,” she said. “It’s really life accelerated. It is really intensified in every way.”

Merkley, who also works for the Family Support Center, runs a support group that allows women from polygamous families to talk about their issues and reach out for help and advice.  Utah also takes part in the Safety Net Committee, which began in 2003 and holds monthly meetings in Utah, Arizona and British Columbia. Government agencies, non-profits and interested members of the public consult the committee to ensure polygamous families have the same educational opportunities and access to police, safety and government services as the general public.

Merkley is also working with polygamous groups on a marriage manual specifically tailored to such families.

Even with her education, training and firm grounding in the Mormon faith, Merkley admits the task can be humbling.

“Oftentimes I’ve had to rewrite and rethink everything basic that I would use anywhere else,” she said. “I try to be respectful and they are patient and forgiving and say that just doesn’t work and this is why. Yeah, it’s an ongoing process that I’m hoping stays active and continues on.”

Social workers such as Patricia Merkley are committed to understanding and treating fairly people of all persuasions. To read the “National Association of Social Workers Standards for Cultural Competence in Social Work Practice” click here. You may also want to look at NASW’s Diversity and Cultural Competence issue fact sheet by clicking here.